GETTING TO KNOW OUR FAMILY

The boys with Dad

The boys are doing really well with transitioning to their life in California. We have been home less than 2 weeks and it seems to be feeling more like home for them everyday. The schedule is working and they are really good sleepers. We feel like all we do is eat, change diapers, and then put them to bed.

Great Grandma with Sasha

There have been several visits from family and the boys have met their 3 great grandparents this week. Many more family have visits scheduled over the next month or so. We look forward to introducing them to everyone in time.

Looking for the Cat outside

What one does the other does. They work as a team or they work in exact opposites it depends on their moods. We see the back of their heads like this often. They are also getting used to bare heads and bare feet in the California warmth.

One of their new friends Louella at the beach park

We have made only a couple adventures out to meet people but have spent the last couple days at home for the Thanksgiving Holiday. We are really excited to just have some time to get well and rested and over our colds brought from Ukraine.

The boys in their tropical beach room

The boys are sharing a room for now and they are doing well with it. They sleep next to each other and don't seem to wake each other up much. They can see each other when they do get up and we are now finding them quietly waiting for us to get them up.
We will keep you up to date and hope to see you all soon.

HOME AT LAST!

On the flight from London to Los Angeles, 10.5 hours

We have made it home and we are so happy to be here! We are so overwhelmed with all of the things that our friends and family have done in the house. We have started our transition back to California time but it is taking a few days. The boys slept almost 12 hours last night and are taking their nap right now. I apologize for the delay in the post. We have also been finding our way around getting to tasks while keeping the boys safe and happy. They are overwhelmed with the wonderful toys and can’t decide what to play with first. We got home Monday night and had a nice drive with my brother Chris up PCH with a beautiful smoke sunset. When we got home the house was clean and fully stocked. As very tired new parents we were able to take the boys up to their room, show them around, change their diapers and get new pajamas on them. It was then not too hard to get them to sleep in their cribs. It made us feel almost like experienced parents. That hasn’t lasted! They are so happy here in the US and Losha will show you just how excited he is.

WE ARE COMING HOME!!!!

Just like our trip has gone so far, another surprise has happened for the ending. We have just completed our paperwork on Friday in time for the weekend. That means we are free to leave and emmigrate these boys to the USA. We are really glad to have this very busy and of course stressful day behind us and it really took the boys out of their routine. What continues to be evolving is the understanding that we have very sturdy troopers for boys. They spent the majority of the day in a medical facility getting there exam for the embassy or in a car on our laps. The day progressed along just as Olga had planned and we made every deadline set for us, mostly by the skin of our teeth.

We are scheduled to leave here Sunday and make it home late Monday or Early Tuesday morning. This has truly been an incredible journey and we have learned so much about the Ukrainian culture and people.

THREE FUNNY STORIES

We are in our last day in Mykolayiv and are frantically trying to get all essentials bought and all tasks we can do done before we pick up those little squirming bundles of joy. We skipped a morning visit today as we got everything packed and did our last shopping run. Diapers, bottom cream and cereal are a few. We are ready except we are finalizing a few gifts for the boy’s caregivers and the local directors. Wow, we have a lot of stuff. Olga and our driver from Kyiv will arrive here sometime tonight and we will have one nights sleep before picking the boys up at about 9:30am. This is perfect for us. We get to say goodbye and not in the dark of night. We will be giving our cake and coffee for the caregivers and medical staff, getting any final information we can, taking pictures, and dressing our boys in their new clothes to leave the baby house for good. We are hoping that at least a couple of them have written notes for our boys to take. All the paperwork is done so they are ready to go. We may have some down time as we travel but we will get some kind of post up to let you know we are in Kyiv. Olga has a very nice apartment reserved for us and we should have a comfortable stay there with the boys.

Now that the update is done to the funny stories!

Yesterday we did another donation to the baby house as we withdrew the boy’s social money and took it to the accountant of the facility. We didn’t think much about it but Sasha said let’s take the car so we don’t have to walk with cash. We’ve been walking with cash for the last month! When the cashier called us up when our withdrawal was ready, we then knew what she was talking about. They gave it to us in twenties which made it look very big in large wraped stacks. Eight stacks of bills plus another thousand in 100’s. The bank was filled with older people waiting as well. Greg said that the lady behind me was counting along with us and had big eyes. It wasn’t until we got home and looked in our Ukraine book to determine how much money that is in relation to most citizens. It was equal to about an average years salary for a Ukrainian. For those older women it must have looked amazing and Sasha said it is the biggest she has taken out because there are two children. This money is going to help them replace the windows in the area of the house the boys lived in for the past 14 months.

Also, while I was standing in line at the processing window where we gave them all the paperwork and showed our passports for the social money, a women behind me noticed something on my coat that she just couldn’t let pass. She grabbed my coat and pulled me towards her so she could do a better job. She licked her fingers and rubbed out the whatever-it-was. She was talking to me the whole time and Sasha and the social worker were snickering while Greg was trying to keep me from pulling it out of her hands so she could do her work.

The other funny story is from 3 days ago. Greg and little Sasha had been following a pigeon when we were outside for our walk. They walked away from Losha and I and then I heard a "Whoa!" from Greg and a covey of birds flew off. Then I saw a cat run off with the pigeon that Greg and Sasha were following in its mouth. Greg didn’t know whether to watch or pull him away but didn’t want to startle Sasha so they just turned quickly and walked away. There are many cats on the property and we fear for the happiness and sanity of our cat at home. At least Baci will loose a few pounds running away from small hands.

BUSTING OUT OF THE BABY HOUSE! TEST RUN.

In front of the delivery house where they were born.

Big Sasha says, "Just born babies!"

Only for 2 hours, but we got them out on an off-campus pass. We had a little outing to the passport office today for paperwork and more photos for the authorities. We went in Victor's car and the boys sat on our laps in the back seat with no fuss. They were very interested in looking at all the cars and buses go by. At the office we had only a few minute wait in the hall and then we went into a room with two people working. We sat to wait for a few more minutes and they were ready for us. I was pleased to see a computerized program and digital photo system set up. The boys had to sit on a stool, with our help of course, to get a digital image to be sent to Kyiv for authentication and confirmation of their identity. They are really officially ours now. We have new birth certificates with our names on them and adoption certificates that state their name change and where they are from. Sasha has been very efficient with our time and the paperwork has gone quite easily for us. Behind the scenes it is quite time consuming and requires extensive networking to get anything done.

Sasha our facilitator with Losha

We had our own little photo session in front of the delivery house where the boys were born and spent there first week of life. It is very close to the Baby House and we have walked past it several times on our way to the big market. We feel like this was a very good day! Not only for our paperwork process but for our piece of mind with the boys and travel. This was their first time in a car since they were placed in the orphanage. Mind you this was only a test and many hours in a car or plane will be a much more challenging feat. But Losha was even able to fall asleep lying on me in the car on the way back from the passport office. The warm heater and hum of the road just put him to sleep.

Gift Crest from the Baby House Director

We were also given a gift of this City crest from the Baby House Director. She was unable to meet us today because she was away at a meeting but gave it to Sasha ahead of time so we would get it this weekend. There have also been a couple requests for photos of our family from the Local Board of Custody Director and the Baby House Director. We will try to find some frames and get prints done. These will make good gifts.

TOUR DE MYKOLAYIV

Victor and Sasha in front of Victory Park

WWII Memorial

We took a tour of Mykolayiv on Wednesday. It was a welcome chance to learn more of our boys' hometown. Victor and Sasha were ideal interpretors for the job. Both grew up in Mykolayiv and attended universities here. Sasha has two degrees, and speaks both English and French. Victor studied at the Shipbuilding College, the most prestigious in Ukraine and the former Soviet Union.

We had already visited the main drag, vul Radnyanska, on shopping excursions for the boys. It is a wide street closed to traffic, filled with higher end stores and anchored by an unusually loud McDonalds. Nearby, is the Museum of Shipbuilding and Fleet. There was once an arguement between which town, Odessa or Mikolayiv, had the nicest museum of this sort. But since a fire burned down the museum in Odessa, there is little question that we visited the finest one. Victor comes from a military family and was able to add personal details to the exhibits.

Ukrainian language Theatre. The city's two theatres, one in Russian language, the other in Ukrainian, still shows the dichotomy of their evolving identity.

Mykolayiv is best known as a shipbuilding port. Originally named, "New Shipyard on the Ingul River" in 1789, the port has formed the identity of the town and its citizens for nearly 230 years. It has had some hard times since the dissolution of the Soviet Union. Once the center for shipbuilding for all of the Republic, the switch to a capitalist market has been understandably difficult. The port was the heart of Mykolayiv, employing most of the town and providing high incomes compared to most other jobs. Warships, aircraft carriers, and seemingly anything else that floated were built here. But when Ukraine gained its independence, the Soviet demand for ships faded and production was mostly halted. The port was forced to sell its steel for scrap just to survive. Fortunately there is evidence that the market is steadily building by manufacturing for the private sector. In the photo below you can see a yacht being constructed behind the red and green cranes. The shipbuilding univerity has also diversified, and offers a larger selection of Majors. Kathy and I have noted before the groups of students walking the streets.

Ship building port now building luxury yachts

Mykolayiv also has the nickname, "City of Brides." Men from around Ukraine and the world come here in search of romance and spouses. The women of Mykolayiv are considered some of the most beautiful in the world. There is an unconfirmed story that traces the source to Peter the Great, who asked that the most beautiful single women in Russia be brought to the Mykolayiv region to become the brides of his soldiers. In current times, the combination of a country with more women than men, a volitile economy, and an embrace of feminine ideals lost in many western countries, has led to a robust international dating scene.

Memorial to Afghanistan War in Victory Park

The art on the streets and the ships on the water remind us of home. We walked through Victory Park. On one side of vul Prospect was the memorial to World War II Veterans. On the other side, a memorial to the Afghanistan War Veterans. A paved trail leads to the river, unpopulated in the autumn weather. Sasha told us that in the summer the area is filled with parties, kiosks, and tent pubs. We see volleyball courts with the nets taken down for the season. The autumn, with falling leaves and dropping temperatures feels more appropriate for our visit, leaving behind one season and trancending toward another.

Footbridge across the Ingul River

Our great thanks to Andrea and the rest of our Virtual Shower and Home-Readying Team! It has been a challenge for us to figure out a way to be ready when we arrive home with all the pieces in place for the boys. A blind adoption, where we didn't know the sex, age or disability of the child, gave us little opportunity to prepare ahead. We are so thankful to everyone for your help. You truly are a part of this journey to bring these boys home.

Andrea is requesting any gifts arrive at Pacific Therapy in Ventura by November 18. From there, gifts will be delivered to our home where our home-readying team will get all the parts together. Shipping directly to our home is also fine. If there are hand-me-downs that need a good home let us know. Most of all we love to hear your bits of wisdom and well wishes.

Thank you planners, donors, and well wishers. We look forward to returning home and having a great gathering to introduce each of you to our new sons as soon as possible.

SUPER NANNIES!

The nannies were seen in action today as one of the little ones took a bad fall and landed on his head hard. You know what happened next. A wail from the little boy and as he was turned over a stream of blood ran from his head about an inch above his eyebrows. Quick action and a cloth for compression was established as the child was held still. Of course this happened with 6 other children in the room Greg and I as well as two other caregivers. They were very calm but stern with the other kids to keep them away and engaged in their own tasks of getting dressed. Within seconds there were gloves, disinfectant and more pressure dressings. The medical staff was immediately summoned and we know from all our time there that the nurse on staff is only about 40 ft from where this happened. The staff was very calm. With that many children I'm sure heads get hit quite often. They just bleed so much it is very dramatic.



Just last week we got a taste of this with Losha. He has a little test he does with me and goes into the kitchen area where he is not allowed. Of course he looked and saw that I was coming to get him out, turned quick and ran directly into the corner of the wood table. His little head directly the height to land at his eye level. He missed the eye but hit the side of his head. He let out only a little cry and then stopped and I thought "that was a hard one, what a tough head." Well he was not doing well getting on with the next task and I then noticed that he had a welt in that impact spot. I showed the Nannie and it was right to the ice bottle in the freezer. Now he was crying and screaming with the ice pressed onto his head. It was my first of many of these little trauma's I'm sure. It was not easy to see him crying and not be sure if he was hurt or just really mad. Well he was just really mad. It only took about 3 minutes and Greg had him calmed down and onto the push toys in the Veranda.



They are in good hands here and we are excited to get to have our interpreter with us tomorrow during our visit. We are hoping to get some information about habits and see if they are sleeping with the blankets we got for them. We are also going to share with them our letter that we had interpreted into Ukrainian. We have 4 copies to give out and we hope it spurs on some letters from them to our boys. We think this would be so wonderful to have for the boys as they grow and understand their first year and a half was with these wonderful ladies. They have been at this baby house we think without leaving since they were 2 months old. We still have so many questions about our boys and we plan to gather as much information in the next week as we can. All of a sudden the time seems so short to get all the answers.

GETTING CLOSER ALL THE TIME

The boys are doing well even if they don't look happy in this photo, they are. The Italian family was taking our picture and the boys get very serious in the presence of strangers. But, as you can see below, she was a better photographer than we were.

Family from Italy

We are very excited for the pending paperwork and then traveling home. We plan to leave this region and travel to Kyiv by car around the 15th of November. We then will be in Kyiv for about 3-4 days to do Embassy paperwork and get their Visa's. Then we fly home sometime around November 22nd. (Written, per usual, with stick in the sand.)

So many have asked how they can help so we have put together some registries on-line. The regular places and they are easy to access on-line or at the store. Amazon.com, target.com, and Babiesrus.com All under Kathy and Greg Jones.

Thank you for hanging in there with us. The support and suggestions from home have made all the difference in this trip.

Best to all!

Baby House #2

Mural outside Baby House

Outside the Veranda Playroom

Most days start with us walking to the Baby House to meet the boys at 9:30 or 9:45. The walk takes about 20 minutes and passes through neighborhoods, mainly. Buses clog the streets at times but mostly small vans with number cards in the windows drop off and pick up passengers at unmarked areas of most neighborhoods. We have adapted our dress and habits to blend in quite well. As long as I keep my camera in my pocket we look like we belong. My new black shiny purse blends much better than the green square travel pouch I came with. We got circled by two guys one of our first days walking around here on our own. The focus was on that green pouch. So that was the last of carrying it on this trip! Olga warned us that tourists, particularly "rich" Americans, can become targets for petty theft here. We take different routes to the baby house and try not to speak too much English. Some days we have Victor drive us, and maybe take us to the grocery store or downtown to do some shopping.

When we arrive at the baby house the boys are usually waiting in the playpen just after having a snack or getting their pants changed. Sasha comes to get picked up by Daddy and Losha gets very shy and puts his finger in his mouth. After we say hello we get the boys shoes on.

Yanna insists on putting Sasha's shoes on when most others just give us the shoes now. Sandals for Inside but if we are going out the full outfit gets put on. We go to the mud room and put outside shoes on, sweatshirt, coat, and hat on.

Outside there are many playpen areas and Natasha is handing out leaves. We have seen many bouquets of leaves collected by children.

Losha is very comfortable in the presence of the fences as he poses for Daddy. We spend about 1.5 or 2 hours with the boys; up until lunch and nap time. They sometimes cry when we leave and sometimes they don't even know we have left. The first time they cried we both looked at each other and got a little smile. They are still very happy in the Baby house and they have about 2 weeks until we will take them away forever. The nannies have even started to take their own pictures to remember our boys. We will leave a few reminders for them and we have an address that we can send updates to.

BRAINSTORMING

Alright all you parents and helpful observers, here's where we call upon your insight and wisdom for a safe and sane transition home. We are anxious to hear your tips, best practices, and suggestions on essential gear.

Because we didn't know the age, sex, or condition of our future children before we came to Ukraine, (and certainly didn't expect to find two!) our preparation is a bit behind. We've just returned from the street market where Sasha and Victor helped us find a collapsible double stroller, two winter coats, two onesies, two jammie things, and two hats. We'll finish off the clothes shopping later this week with shoes, underclothes, diapers, more diapers, and a good going away outfit.

Here's the 411 on the boys to help with your suggestions (just multiply by two):

• Weight: 23.5 pounds
• Height: 32.25 inches tall (2ft, 8in)
• 18 months old
• Not potty trained
• As an amendment to Newton's Laws of Motion, the boys movements tend to be in equal and opposite direction to one another.
  
• They both walk well on flat surfaces, with the occasional hand plant or tumble thrown in.

• Both boys need some catching up in language skills, since they have only been spoken to in Russian.

• Their food at the orphanage is BLAND. No sugar or salt. Some dairy. They have never eaten any citrus foods and we probably shouldn't experiment on the way home.
  

We need your suggestions for the flight home, getting around town, at-home safety, ways to corral two children with one parent, bathtime, bedtime, feeding time, and any other time I'm forgetting.

Thanks all.

Court Day

Our First Photo as Parents!

Well, we did get the nice Judge. It took about 30 minutes in total to answer all the questions and state our desire to adopt these boys. The decision of the court was given and we are now the legal parents of two twin boys!!! There seemed to be no problems and everything went smoothly. Greg did most of the talking as customary and in his case normal. Our ride started out normal, our regular driver Victor picked us up at 9:15am and took us to the orphanage. The orphanage director came out and we put her in the front seat with Victor. We left the baby house and then headed in a direction that we didn't expect. Victor weaved around a few streets amongst big block apartment complexes like the one we stay in and asked several people how to get to somewhere. At this point I thought we must be picking up someone else, but who? Then we found a building and Victor got out to ask her a question then she got into the car with us and we drove away. She was definitely upset or frustrated and I understood "Taxi" and "city center" in Russian, and all the body language. She continued to tell me the whole story all the way to the court house. I said nothing but nodded in understanding, and didn't let on that I did not speak Russian. She seemed like a nice lady and I thought she must be part of the medical staff or somehow related to the baby house or Director. Later we found out that she was the Juror for our case and had some difficulty with transportation this morning.

As we filed into a door we expected a courtroom but it was just his office. We took the only open seats and took our coats off. Olga did move her chair to be close to us. Our Judge was smooth headed and large stature. He seemed to be all business as I feel he had a long day of sessions in front of him. We introduced ourselves and stated our name, DOB, residence, occupation and education. There were questions about accepting the court staff and accepting the application in full and we just had to answer, Yes! Then the Judge had some questions like why did you choose Ukraine and why not the US? How well off are you financially and who will care for the children? Things like that which Greg answered and I just put in my 2 cents from the side. I got to say how much we love the children, and how excited we are to adopt them. The Orphanage Director and the social worker from the Local Board of Custody stated the history of the children. Then with no questions the Prosecutor declared that she approved the application for adoption and then the Judge gave the decision and we were done. Olga did her paperwork stuff with the Judge and we went our of the office as the next group of people filed into the room.

Victor took us to the best Pizza place in town to celebrate with Olga. On our way home we stopped to see the bridge lifting to let a tanker boat through. Much of the city stopped because there was traffic backed up and everyone got out of the cars to watch the boat go by.

Tomorrow we will see the boys for the first time as their parents.

The stroller AGAIN???!!!

Boys taking a walk around the Baby House.

This is one of our common walks around the baby house. Both boys enjoy pushing along with the stroller. I don’t know why I love this so much but it almost seems choreographed or something. A couple of days ago we were over in the bigger play area and we brought the guitar with us. There are two Italian couples in the process with boys as well but they are a couple years older than our boys. The kids did not know our boys so it was an interesting lesson of how they might act around strangers in our presence. They were very quiet and stayed very close almost leaning on me. They listened as Greg played some soft tunes. We came out there because the Italian couple had asked if we would play in the garden for their child as well. The older boys were not so interested in the guitar as our boys but mostly there was this tension of not knowing these strangers. All of a sudden both boys at the same time started for the stroller about 5-6 feet away from us. They began to push it so I turned it around and gave them the back end like in the video. They pushed and pushed and didn’t stop, let go, or look back. They were done with the big kid’s playground and wanted to walk. It was good to see that they have some mechanisms for comfort. Tasks that are familiar can hopefully be used as comforts for the trip home.

MEALS

Our meals have gradually become more complex. Certainly more complex than when we had six pieces of ham, six pieces of cheese, and a loaf of bread. We have also tried to cut back on the piles of dumplings we were eating, so conveniently frozen, so quick to make, and so delicious. We can't always identify the ingredients, but all of them seem to taste good. Olga even improved them by suggesting a simple sour cream and dill sauce. Our biggest cravings are for fresh green vegetables and salads. They are strangely missing from the Ukrainian diet. We recently found a small bag of frozen broccoli that we coveted for a special occasion. Last night we made tuna noodle casserole, good ol' comfort food, Ukrainian style. Really, all our best meals have been attempts at comfort food.

Ukrainian Sliders and Fries

We are using every culinary trick in our chapbook. Flexibility is very important. We've pan fried an unknown white fish with onions and garlic successfully. We've made sliders on slices of baguette with homemade oven fries. We've roasted a whole chicken with stuffing made from our stale bread and leftover salami, then made a good chicken soup the following day by boiling the remains. We attempted macaroni and cheese but the unidentified cheese, (looks like Monterrey Jack), would not melt. The leftovers from that ultimately became the base for our Tuna Noodle Casserole.

This is how we shop for groceries: We spot a picture of tuna on a can, recognize elbow noodles through clear plastic, pick a pint of cream by the percentage of fat listed on the milk carton, and find a can with peas by the picture on the label. Mushrooms are mushrooms the world round. We topped it off with corn flakes. Of course I would have preffered cream of mushroom soup, like any good midwesterner, but that was a bit beyond our shopping linguistics.

Still, nothing has tasted exactly the same as home just yet. Often we buy the wrong ingredients altogether. Mayonnaise is a picture of a hard boiled egg and a sunflower on a juice box. We figured that out last Friday. Yesterday we bought an envelope with a picture of garlic on the front, thinking it was garlic powder. Turned out to be dried garlic greens. Orange juice? Nope. Grapefruit juice. Water or sparkling water? We still have no idea.

Even eating out can catch us. We went for pizza yesterday at a place that Sasha and Victor, her husband, recommended. The board menu behind the counter was in Russian, but not to worry. When I asked the hostess if she had a menu in English, fairly common in Kyiv, she pointed to the register and said, "He speaks English." Sweet. I ordered a Pepperoni Pizza and two Hike Beers. The beer tasted just like I expected. And the pizza? Well, here is a photograph of our pizza--our Pepper-Only Pizza. I guess we will keep trying.

More of what you Want!

This is one way that the boys have been trained to take walks. Many groups of children walk around the baby house with about 6-8 kids per caregiver. They learn very early to walk holding onto the stroller so that they can be corralled by one person. We hope to keep this practice going even at home. Today we did this walk and they lasted for about 10 minutes then we put them in the stroller for another 20 minutes of walking in big circles around the whole house. I'll show you a video of this sometime soon. My video ran out of battery today.







This is one of my favorite photos of Sasha.












This is one of my favorite photos of Losha.







We get a lot of photos in the stroller because they are confined for good access. We also got good news today Olga has our approval paperwork from the Department of Adoption in Kyiv that we needed and she has her train ticket to arrive here at 6:30am on Sunday morning. She has to be on the train for 12 hours all night to get to us. She will then have time to brief us for our court date on Monday morning at 10 am.

THE PROCESS

Now that our decision has been made here is some insight on how we expect to move forward, or sidways, depending. Running marathons has prepared Kathy and I well--International adoption is an endurance sport. We believe we are halfway home.

On Monday we have our meeting with the judge in Mykolayiv. We expect all to go well. Sasha, our facilitator here, tells us we are lucky. We have the "nice judge." After court, we begin a ten day waiting period, a standard process to give parents time to be absolutely sure about the family fit. After these ten days, we have the option of either bringing the children to our apartment or continue to visit the orphanage. Though it is nice having the caregivers change the diapers and wash the slobbery clothes, we agree that we want the boys with us as soon as possible. There is so much to learn about them before we travel. During this, our facilitators will be filing paperwork to get new birth certificates with our names included, Ukraine social security numbers, and their passports. The wait for passports should be approximately five days. Then we return to Kyiv, hopefully by car and not train. The train leaves Mykolayiv only at 7pm, takes twelve hours to Kyiv, and Olga warned us to expect a sleepless night from all the rattling. By car it is a five-hour drive with pit stops.

Once in Kyiv, we register the boys with the US Embassy where they get a medical exam and Olga submits paperwork for their visas. With all this complete we begin our travel home. It is a short flight to London, and a long flight to California. Of course this is all written in mud, dependent on many variables that like to change unpredictably. So hang in there, we'll be home as soon as we can.

DA!

This is the veranda that we like to go to with the boys for some peace and quiet. It is an enclosed patio so it is very cool which is a contrast from the main playroom which is HOT. They dress them up so very warm for going outside. Sweatshirt over their long sleeved shirt, long legging socks, then a coat and hat to top it off. They are a big bundle ready for the outdoors. I got to peak at all the layers today during a diaper change. I counted 6 in all 7 with the hat.
Sasha will now say a few words!

VIOLET AND THE BOYS

The women at the orphanage are so very sweet and caring to all the kids. This video of Losha with one of the caregivers lets me know that he really feels loved and he has a really good chance at a healthy life. We could not have asked for a better situation to fall into. Beautiful boys, great care, and there are two of them!! We are getting used to the idea of two but it sure can keep you up at night thinking of all the ways to corral and travel with two, not to mention all the baby proofing needed at home. We’ll have plenty of time for that when we get there. It looks like we will be racing to get back by the Thanksgiving Holiday. Of course this is a long time but now that we are sure of the direction it will go faster.

OUR BOYS

Here you go, we have made our intentions clear and the paperwork is filed, we are officially in Love!! We had fun deciding which photos to show you first. We picked a couple from our first days meeting them, and then a few days later. Looking over the video from just a week you can see big changes in their smile, pace of movement and verbalization. Individualized treatment is noticed by all the children and they are all attracted. We will use their nicknames from the orphanage for now and American names will follow after we get home. Losha is on the left and Sasha on the right in the swing and in the stroller. Have fun, we certainly are.

STILL WAITING...

We have spent 9 days with the boys and they just get cuter each day. They recognize who we are and come to us immediately. One of their little friends points them out to us if they are in a play pen. Most days we see them twice. We see them once from 9:30-11:00 and again 4-5:30. Yesterday it was almost 6 pm and I think the caregiver was trying to tell us that it was late for their afternoon snack. What they don’t understand is if they are telling us something like when or if they have eaten we don’t understand. We just nod and smile. Sometimes we speak Spanish by accident. We don’t have an interpreter with us at our visits. We plan to have one at a couple sessions when it gets closer to the time for transition to our care. We are still waiting for some final tests to make sure they are cleared for adoption. Of course the Ukrainian way caused a significant delay and what we thought would be a couple days is now a week for the results. Everything is just a little bit harder here. I’m not sure if that is homesickness or just acknowledgement of the situation. Not having the language at our convenience has been very difficult for Greg and I. Small phrases only go so far, then the hand signals start. We just got a cellular connection to our laptop so we can keep you up to date more often. Sorry there has been some down time but it has been tough for us as well. We look forward to sharing more with you soon. Greg also found a guitar at a local shop so he has something to keep him busy. We will take it to the orphanage as soon as we get some children’s songs worked up. Greg only knows Bob Dillon and Tom Waits songs, so those won’t work. I know you are all dying to see the boys and we will do our best. You can email or respond to the blog now and we will get your messages. We love to hear from you all so don’t be shy. We will respond to as many as we can.

SUSPENSE...

Don't mean to leave you all in suspense like this. Since coming to Mikolav the internet has been challenging, as have other things we now know are easier in Kyiv. But we have found a hotel a block away with wifi connection, accesible after buying a four dollar card downtown. We are heading to the orphanage in a short while to play with the boys, and feed them some fruit. We are allowed two hours in the morning and two in the afternoon when paperwork does not get in the way.

We are still waiting on some blood test results before we make our final decision. The boys are younger than the age typically adopted, so their next set of blood tests wasn't scheduled until some time next month. But blood was drawn two days ago and is in Odessa now. We should have the results by tomorrow. Then we will be able to move forward and show you the photos and video that are piling up on our camera.

Olga has left for Kyiv, to help a family adopt a child with Downs Syndrome. We have a new translator here, Sasha, and her husband Victor drives us around town. The apartment we are staying in is Victor's mother's. She has emigrated to Italy and they now rent the place to visiting foreigners. Time to run...we will try to write more soon.

Mikolav

As always in international adoption there is uncertainty and changing plans. We are not waiting for our appointment we already had it and have left Kiev on an amazing journey. Again early in the morning, 4am we drove to Mikaylov in southern Ukraine. It took us 5 hours of bumpy and foggy conditions to get there by 10am. Our goal was 11am to the orphanage because it is Friday and the orphanage director has a shortened day. We did arrive in time and got to hear of the medical condition and to our wonderful surprise there was not a lot to tell. Some delay, of course expected and definitely without parents. Abandoned at birth by the birth mother and she did not have any documentation to say who she was. Totally orphaned from birth. Now for the incredible part they are twins. I know there are going to be more than one of you that will say, "I told you so". We can not believe it ourselves. We are in the deciding phase and there are still uncertainties that can occur but we really like these boys. We will visit every day and see if a bond grows. If all of their medical exams check out as we expect we will move into the paperwork phase. We do not want to get you all too attached yet so we will put up some pictures as soom as we do make our final decision. Oh, by the way, they are 16 months old and very cute. It seems almost impossible to find such young boys in Ukraine that are available for us. They just came off the domestic adoption list and one hour later we were having a meeting and deciding if we wanted to go see them. We have a lot of good work to do and if all goes well we will be here for about 20 days. Then back to Kiev for a little while. This region has some challenges as well so hopefully Olga will work her magic again. We apologize for the delay but this is the first chance we had to get to internet access. I think we will be able to have access now at a local hotel.
Thank you for hanging in there with us, we are doing perfectly well.

Rotary Kyiv-Centre

Dr. M. Mominul Hoque, Recent president 07-08 with Kathy and Greg

All the rotarians out there will be proud of me. Greg and I attended a Wednesday evening Rotary meeting in the Business Centre of Kyiv. District 2230 established 8/31/1999. There were about 20 people around a table at 6:30 pm. We had Olga call the day before to get the address and she of course set us up with a driver. There were nerves for what type of meeting and if anyone would speak English. We were in good hands as always with Rotarians. They greeted us after a couple enchanges with English as we stumbled with our Russian. I was prepared to introduce myself and Greg and use Rotarian Americanitz. We were sat next to a translator and then had a birthday announcement with flowers and a gift. I felt like I was at home in Ojai-West. We were introduced and I described where we were from and some of the recent projects of our club. We also were interested in finding a point person to assist with medical supply transport assistance from Direct Relief International. The contact with Matt MacCalla that I made at a Rotary meeting a couple of months ago led to conversation on the limitations that he sees in getting shipments into Ukraine. We met 2 physicians who may be hellpful with these major issues and a business man who was most interested in helping in any way. They talked about matching grants as well and we can always connect with them in the future on issues. It was very nice and we are glad we went. Thank you Rotary for this opportunity.

Current President and Kathy exchanging flags during the meeting.

PHOTOS

Our apartment in Kiev. Google Earth us...

Statue of Ukrainian writer, Shevchenko. (Little girl bonus.)

Love, Ukrainian Style

The Begging Dogs

We have no idea what this is...mounted to our wall with blinking red light...

RAINY DAY

We Spoke with Olga yesterday. She spent the afternoon lobbying at the National Adoption Agency. Appointments with officials occur on Tuesday, at the agency’s leisure. We hope to hear the date for our next review of available children by Thursday.

Our daily walk was rained out today, but we should have a more active evening. Olga has arranged a taxi to take us to a Rotary Meeting in the business center of Kiev tonight. We aren’t sure if anyone will speak English, but hope to find someone that will politely nod along.

Otherwise, our conversations will be limited to the following words and phrases:
HELLO/GOODBYE said early and often.
YES/NO note: do not use, ”yes” in place of, “whatever”
PLEASE/THANK YOU our most-used words.
THIS ONE while pointing, usually at food.
CHECK, PLEASE tipping is optional, but expected from tourists.
I DON’T UNDERSTAND. said to just about any question or reply.
EXCUSE ME said after bumping people with luggage in airport.
DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH? usually follows, “I don’t understand.”
BRATWURST a universal word that Chicago taught me well.

So far we have survived on these language staples. Coupled with finger pointing and a common numeric system, we’ve completed essential tasks like getting directions and shopping at the grocery store. Regardless, Kathy comes well-stocked with Rotarian flags and pins. I have ironed my pants and will smile when smiled upon. It is what we are known for here. We are now off to buy lunch. Bratwurst.

OLGA

“I am Olga. I will work for you.” This is the first thing Olga said to me at the airport. She is dressed conservatively by Ukrainian standards. A soft turtleneck sweater and a fitted skirt that hems at the top of her heeled boots. We already know of her reputation from other adoptive parents. Olga has been coordinating adoptions in Ukraine for ten years and after fifty placements she stopped counting. She speaks warmly about the families she has helped. She now asks that her families limit sending greeting cards to Christmas and Birthdays, otherwise the amount of mail is overwhelming. Our agency has said they wish they had an Olga in every region.

She is warm with us and well versed in the needs of adopting parents that are non-Ukrainian speaking, unfamiliar with the streets, unable to read the Cyrillic alphabet, jetlagged, and hungry. She tells us exactly what to pay the driver, and that we can pay him in American dollars. Most things we can pay for in American dollars.

Her English is clean and she speaks to us like writing a letter. “Today, I shall take you for groceries. Tomorrow you will do this for yourselves.” She walks with a swing that makes men and women step from her path. We shuffle in her wake like ducklings. We were told our first list of tasks. She checked the exchange rate at a nearby bank and we switch some US dollars into hryvnias. We bought groceries at a small market a block from our apartment. “You will need water.” She grabs two bottles from the store shelf and hands them to me. We've learned it is better to simply follow her lead and save our fumbling for later. She continues, “You will have six slices of ham and six slices of cheese. This will be enough food for breakfast.”

She took us to the “Double Coffee”, a restaurant with menus in English and pictures of the food. We like pictures. Kiev students sit around us practicing their English language skills. Here, we got our first example of how she would work for us. Our young waiter forgot to divide the bill, accidentally including her meal on our check. She sighed and shook her head. She called him back to the table and spoke to him in Ukrainian. Her voice revved louder and faster, leading to a punctuating hand spearing into the air. The young waiter lowered his head and conceded. She continued. Some students glanced over, but turned when she looked their way. After two minutes of explanation from Olga, the waiter walked away to correct the problem. Kathy and I thought she was finished, perhaps the passion was just a characteristic of the language. But a moment later, “One moment, I will go to help him.” She walked to the register where she found more employees to straighten out. She came back to our table completely unflustered. “They tell me he is new. This is a good lesson for him.” She continues, “The youth, they want to make money and not earn money.”

During this process, when so many parts of adoption are dependent on the details, it brings a certain comfort that she will let nothing slip by us. Later we witness her same demand for perfection repeated; when a bank has trouble processing our debit cards, when a landlord has difficulty calculating US dollars to hryvnias, at the airport when we are charged for overweight luggage. We are happy that she is on our side.

When our young waiter returned with the corrected bill she smiles, “Yes, this is perfect.” The waiter bowed respectfully and walked away quickly. In moments we were talking about the miracle of adoption.

KHARKIV ORPHANAGE

We have just arrived back in Kiev without choosing a child from the orphanage. We left Kharkov this morning at 5:30 am. Our flight was at 7:40am and left on time. It looks like we will be here for about a week.

Now back to our stay in Kharkov. We arrived very late Thursday night at our apartment, near midnight. We had a meeting at 9:15am at the local department and then off to the orphanage. The orphanage was hard to find amongst tenant row apartment like buildings with winding streets. We finally found the Dyetskaye Dom (Baby House). It was very clean and stood out in comparison to the surrounding buildings. The women wore white coats and none spoke English. We sat in the director’s office and she greeted us and asked about our family. Olga seemed to be giving her some details about us and our book that we had back at the Department in Kiev. She then went over the medical information in much more detail and told of some diagnoses we had not heard at the first meeting. Then she said “the boy is here”. He was led in by the hand and he just about ran into Greg’s arms. He was a cute boy with beautiful Red/brown hair and was quite tall. We played in the room for maybe 10 minutes. We got out some toys and started to interact. They then took us to another playroom. I led him down a flight of stairs and he was walking step over step but was on his toes. We did a number of gross motor and fine motor tasks, tried as much verbal and social interaction as we could. There was an Italian couple with a small boy doing the same thing. The boys interacted a little but not much. Our charge was quite active and very distractible. I held him and that seemed to make him calm for a while. We asked questions about language and he doesn’t use any understandable words. We sat him to do some coloring and he made one mark on the page and then bit the tip off the orange crayon. We were sweating from the 30 minute event. It felt like there were a few positive spots, but it was obvious he had problems we would not be able to correct. Just as Jill taught me in my pre-travel session, he could not be focused for more than a few seconds and he was everywhere. Watching Jan’s speech therapy work has given me insight as well as to the lack of available time that this child has for learning. We were in agreement that his brain was not going to be very moldable in the future and birth hypoxia and microencephelopathy was too pronounced. We did not need the Doctor to travel to tell us that. We did come out of there with confidence that we made the right choice. We know the whole process and if the right child is in front of us we will know it. We will certainly bring the Doctor to see any child that we are considering.

We are now in a waiting time for Olga to push for our next opportunity for another meeting at the Department to choose another child. We will look around Kiev more and spend time with each other. We have made contact with the Nun that Susan and Fabio met and connected us with. Maybe we can spend time with her after the weekend.

I have to say it felt very good to hold that little boy. He needs that very much.

Miss and love you all.

Interview

Our day started as many have been, tired from less than a full nights sleep. I just couldn’t sleep until early morning so Greg let me sleep until 9:30am. Olga arrived at 12:30 and we had our nice clothes on ready for our first meeting. Our walk went quickly to the department so we wandered along a souvenir and art walk. I had too many nerves to buy anything. We went to the doorway with Olga and were standing with several other people waiting the summons up the stairway. I had such butterflies in my stomach waiting and we walked up the stairs when summoned. Irena was our interviewers name and she was quite young, maybe 25 years old. For some reason seeing her helped calm me down. She looked at our passports and then our photo book and seemed to enjoy thumbing through the pages. She wanted to keep the book at the department. I guess I should have made two. Now we don’t have one for the orphanage. They presented us with 5 cases all boys. They were all under 7 years old and only two under 5. We’ve made a decision to see a 3 year old boy who is in House for Babies #3 in Kharkiv. It is the second largest city in Ukraine. We have plane tickets and an apartment already reserved. Olga works quickly. She takes care of every detail and we are going to fly with her tomorrow night. It’s an hour flight from Kyiv. We will give you many more details when the time is right. We will see him Friday morning and depending on the internet access we will try to put more up Friday or Saturday so you know our next step. Love to all.

WALKING KYIV

Friendship of Nations Monument

The streets of Kyiv are an international blend with many American influences, flying our familiar banners of Coca Cola and McDonald’s throughout their courtyards. Our block is lined with high end stores. Furriers and jewelry, Gucci and Ralph Lauren, with two Addidas Apparel stores are mixed in. The curbs and sidewalks are cluttered with SUVs and BMWs. Freddy Kruger hands out leaflets for the Haunted House that is opening for Halloween. We have eaten at two restaurants: the Double Coffee and Weinsteiner Pub, both with menus in English and pictures of the food. We like pictures. We are slowly building our pointing and nodding technique of food selection so we can branch out to the cafeterias.

Independence Square

The youth dominate the streets. Young men walk with twenty ounce beers in one hand, and hold on to their girlfriends with the other. There is little diversity in appearance between young and old. Nearly everyone is dressed fashionably. Boldness earns extra fashion points. The women couple high heeled boots that wrap just above their calves with their preferred length of leather skirt. The length ranges from the knee to something shorter than the base of a pea coat. Their jackets are fitted, and often brightly colored or sewn from of high-gloss vinyl. Purses are large and sparkle. Faces are perfectly painted at any hour we are on the streets and their hair is sculpted.

Men are included in the national dedication to fashion. Their styles vary from conservatively tailored suits to more gaudy attire. A man rode through the city park on a mountain bike, completely decked out in a bright European jersey, Oakley sunglasses, a Camelback, a helmet, and clipped into his pedals. He looked lost, like he took a wrong turn at a distant trailhead. Two twenty-something guys walked past us by Saint Sophia’s Cathedral. One was dressed in a white linen suit silkscreened with a Chinese dragon down the entire left-hand side. His friend was dressed in the Ukrainian version of hip hop gear; a coordinated Addidas sweat suit, a black New York Yankees hat, his pants not sagging nearly as much as they would in the States. Style is all or nothing.

Padlocks, with lover's names written on them, line a footbridge.

People walk, and walk, and walk, seemingly without a destination. They stroll. There are so many people moving around Independence Square at any given time it is easy to imagine how quickly it filled during the Orange Revolution. Everyone seems exuberant and playful. Despite the perennial beers in hand, I’ve not seen one instance of public drunkenness. Only a few Babushkas hold a cup for spare change. In Kiev it is hard to imagine the situations that caused the surge of orphans and poverty.

VIDEO: Saint Michael's Monastery
Kyiv, Ukraine